There is one question you must never ask yourself. I hear it all the time from people, directly and indirectly. It’s a paralyzing question that steals your power.
Who am I to do this?
Or it could be rephrased something like one of these..
- Who am I to help people with this?
- Who am I to claim I am the expert?
- How am I better than this expert over there?
- Who am I to stand out from the pack?
I call these doubt-producing questions and they don’t help you one bit.
You will never find a good answer to them. They only have terrible answers that will not help you build and market your business. In fact, every answer you come up with will sound more like an excuse not to do anything. Why try when you’re really a nobody? Stay safe, stay small, never stand out, never have an opinion.
You know this isn’t living to your potential, nor is it fulfilling. Who-am-I questions will help you fade out.
You don’t want this.
If you find yourself tempted to ask these types of questions here are a few things to help.
Value your journey
Everyone starts somewhere. No one has all the answers and insights when they begin. You must start where you are. If you are lacking in some skills, then learn as you go. Grow into your role. It really works.
Value your unique gifts and experiences
You are unique and have a lot to offer your customers and clients and anyone you come in contact with. To deny this is to set a low ceiling for yourself and your potential. You have much to give, and as you keep trying, you will find even more to give others. Don’t sell yourself short!
Make a decision
From what I have seen, the difference between those that do and those that don’t is one decision. The decision that they can and so they do. It’s that simple. There is work, and it may not be face, but the belief that you can, will sustain you and help you.
They find a way
We don’t always get what we want on the first try. This is to test us and to help us grow. The challenges shape us into leaders and give us wisdom and courage. If one thing doesn’t work, then try the next. Successful business leaders learn early that failure is nothing. It doesn’t exist. Pick up and go on. Don’t waste time with pointless questions. Get some new questions that lead you to new options.
Your thoughts come don’t come from the wise place
Many thoughts are actually generated in our lower brains. They are utter nonsense. Fear isn’t a higher brain function. Let them all pass on through. Focus your energy on the helpful thoughts only.
If you tried all this and still feel stuck in place, then it’s time to go a step deeper into your mindset.
Look at what you are feeling when you ask those questions to yourself.
What is going on in there?
Fear, reluctance, laziness, worry, doubt, anxiety? What is it for you? Do you have some belief about what you need to do before you can coach, teach or create art for someone for payment?
Do you have some wounds about not being enough, not being appreciated or feeling like you just don’t matter?
This is all deep inner work.
The reality is that there is probably something for all of us we would ask these type of doubt-producing questions to ourselves about. Maybe not our business, but maybe something else. Perhaps a big change you wish you could make in your life, something you really want to do but feel totally inadequate.
It’s alright. We take these thing step-wise. One at a time. As you do, you learn how to handle your doubts, how to have confidence and belief in your own abilities despite the fear. Every successful person develops this ability to act courageously even with inner (or outer) doubt.
So whatever you find yourself asking Who am I to do this, take the opportunity to put that question to rest for good and decide you are enough right now. And decide to believe in yourself. If the question should come again, you are ready to shut it down.
When you decide to believe in yourself, you make it easier for others to do so too, and that is good business.